Laura Carr, LMFT
You have been taught that something is wrong with you and that you are imperfect but there isn't and you're not.
- Cheri Huber
I've been a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist since 2001, and my work has evolved over 30 years of dedicated practice.
It takes tremendous courage to reach out when you are struggling. The Buddhist tenet that "pain is inevitable, suffering is optional" points to what is possible, that there is a path ending suffering. Sadly, most people who experience suffering don't know there is another option. The definition of suffering from a Buddhist lens is, “A deep and pervasive experience of dissatisfaction and unease with life.” Sums it up perfectly in my experience.
I have extensive experience working with individuals and couples who want to end suffering. Suffering generally shows up as symptoms such as, anxiety, depression, addiction, self-hatred disguised as low self-esteem, lack of self-care, feeling easily overwhelmed, self-sabotage, anger issues, self-harm, emotional detachment from others, chronic relationship struggles, eating disorders/body image and more. All of these are, at their core, a disconnection from oneself.
Individuals have a multilayered, often rigid, belief system and are commonly unaware of how these beliefs shape and define their world. Beliefs directly influence thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. In sessions you will learn how this whole process works. You might have intellectual knowledge of it, but knowledge and awareness is not the same thing. And, having someone outside your experience helps illuminate the areas that live in your blind spot.
You will learn how to practice awareness of your internal world, from the perspective of compassion. Awareness, with compassion allows for choice. As we explore your life experiences together, we will identify the disabling beliefs and you can then practice the skills necessary to bring about the changes you desire. These skills will allow you to be with yourself through the painful experiences that naturally occur in life, releasing the patterns that lead to suffering.
Most people carry traumas that are directly or indirectly connected to their current struggles. Traumas come in all forms, and we do not compare them. I like the definition of, “anything that overwhelms the nervous system.” We will explore yours gently and safely, at your pace. We do not go digging for things that aren't showing up. What needs to be witnessed will reveal itself when ready and not a moment sooner. We can trust the process.
*Telehealth and limited in persons appointments available
Fee Range Per Session:
Individual: $225
Couples: $250
Links to learn more about what informs my work:
The Work of Cheri Huber - I was first introduced to the work of Cheri Huber when I stumbled upon her book in 2002. I read, There is Nothing Wrong with You, Regardless of what you were taught to believe and is resonated to the core of my being. In the back of the book what a retreat based on this book and I just knew I had to attend. It took me a few years but in 2006 I attended my first retreat. It was like 5 years of therapy in 8 days. She is my Zen teacher and I am a dedicated practitioner of Zen Awareness Practice. It changed how I do therapy which is why I named my own therapeutic approach, Compassion Based Awareness Therapy (CBAT) because what I do does not fit into any traditional psychotherapy model. It looks and sounds like many of them, but it is not. The only way to know this is to have the experience directly. I’m told almost on a weekly basis how what I offer, the person has never experienced before. While it may not be for everyone, if you are looking to find your way home to your innate goodness, it is possible. I highly recommend any of Cheri’s works. You can find them here. If you like audiobooks, click on this linkwhere four of her books are offered to download for free (you can always give a donation for the generosity). The audiobooks are: There is Nothing Wrong With You: Going Beyond Self-Hate| The Fear Book: Facing Fear Once and for All | The Key and the Name of the Key Is Willingness| The Depression Book.
Trauma & the Nervous System from a Poly Vagal Lens - I stumbled upon Poly Vagal theory later in my career. I’ve always integrated the body but I love the how PolyVagal, coined by Stephen Porges, MD explains the nervous system. I don’t use the lingo of PolyVagal, but I do reference the evolving science.
EMDR - I mentioned above that I went back into therapy in 2021 and intuitively knew I needed something other than talk therapy. I love talk therapy and it has its place; a very important place. But I knew that I could talk my way around not addressing the trauma that was being carried in my body that I didn’t know how to process. I had previously rejected EMDR outright, mainly due to it being marketed as a “miracle” because nothing cures everything and not fast. But I was desperate. I got a referral from someone I trusted and my experience changed my mind. EMDR might not be for everyone. If hesitancy is there, honor that and keep exploring options that can include the body. There are many options: guided imagery, somatic approaches, breath work, dance/movement, improv, singing, and more. What is needed alongside the model is the presence of someone where safety can be created and experienced.
Aspects of the Personality - I am not an IFS (Internal Family Systems) therapist. I was introduced to parts language long before IFS became popular. There is no specific literature that speaks to how I specifically integrate this tool. I was introduced to this in the early 90’s and it was talked about as “inner child” work. My amazing therapist, Mary Wong, Ph.D. introduced me to the critic voice and taught me to externalize that voice and not identify that as “me.” I worked with Mary for 10 years before she was forced to retire due to Alzheimer’s disease. My work with her prepped me perfectly the teachings of Cheri Huber, which is where I learned the term, Aspects of the Personality and you can read more about that in her books, specifically, That Which You Are Seeking is Causing You to Seek. It is also referenced in the books, There is Nothing Wrong With You and Be The Person You Want to Find.
Compassion based Awareness Therapy - Read more about it by clicking here.
In 2021 I returned to therapy myself and chose EMDR because I wanted to understand a particular pattern. After the second session I signed up for training, because it was that powerful. I now offer EMDR as a modality alongside compassion-based awareness work. When appropriate and requested, I have found EMDR to be a profound complement to healing. Additionally, you will be introduced to tuning in with the body, what is often referred to currently as somatics. You will learn how to bring compassionate awareness to all of your experience; thoughts, emotions, sensations, beliefs, and behaviors. Most of us are acutely aware of some and disconnected or unaware of others. They are inter-related. You will be invited to see how these show us for you and that is where intimacy begins.
In couples sessions I use the visual of turning the microscope on yourself, as each partner is 100% responsible for the role they play. We are co-creators of our relationships, and a relationship can only be as healthy as each of its parts. Each person has the opportunity to come to understand their own individual dynamics and how those dynamics impact the relationship. Couples can learn specific tools that allow for resolution and intimacy. Unless we do our own work, we will be run by our unconsciousness. And all harm is acted out of unconsciousness. Our choices either bring us closer together or push us further apart.
Married since 1999, I have the lived advantage of navigating the highs and lows of long partnership. We have two sons, two dogs full of personality, and a sweet cat who looks like the adorable dragon, Toothless. Marriage and parenting have introduced me to experiences and emotions I never imagined: deep joy, complete frustration, awe, laughter, tears, and overall, many opportunities for growth. When time allows, my favorite things are being in nature, going on spiritual retreats, listening to music, moving my body, and spending time with those I love.
License #38400
Video Resources
Practicing is Key!
Put it to Paper
Change the Channel!!
Going Beyond
The Voices
Have The Life You Want!
Relationships